Good morning Ma Mere:

I can’t believe it’s been two years since you left this earth to be with Dad on the other side. Some days it feels like only yesterday. Some days it feels like a lifetime ago. Today, I miss you and can see and feel the last hours of your life slip away as if it was just happening. Today, I am sad and filled with a longing to just be able to give you another hug. To touch your beautiful face and tell you how much I love you and how lucky I was to have you as my mama. But I know you know that and are with me and always will be in my heart and mind. And I want you to know I am no longer feeling totally stuck in my grief.

A few weeks ago, I was having a really hard time. I got so angry. I realized I was tired of being sad and grief-stricken and unable to get out of my own way. I screamed at the world, saying “I’m done with this nonsense! I don’t want to be feeling this way anymore. I JUST WANT MY MOM AND DAD TO COME BACK!!!”

After I said that, I started to feel a little better. I am not sure why, because I know you won’t be coming back in this lifetime. But somehow, I felt better. I started writing songs again. I had a clear vision in my mind of what I can do to help myself and maybe help others, with a writing project I am working on. My faith in a time/space continuum was restored and I know that one day, I shall see you again. You and Dad. We are connected through the Universe and through the love we shared, and that energy will never die. I had lost that belief for a while, but I am feeling it again. I feel it when I see a cardinal or a hummingbird at my feeders. I feel it in the melodies and harmonies that spill from my heart, roll down my cheeks, and flow from my fingers to the keys of the piano and through the vibrations of my vocal cords when I sing. This gift, a direct connection with you Ma Mere, will keep me going. Keep you with me. And always bring you close when I feel lost and alone and lonely.

Yes, it’s been two years. We miss you. And always will. But I can finally keep my promise to you dear mother when you said, “Now, Margaret, you cannot cry forever. Promise me you won’t cry forever.” I promise, Ma Mere. I love you.